My husband
had a follow-up appointment with his doctor to have a check up and
get refills for his medicine, the appointment went like this.....
Doctor..."How
are you doing?"
Hubby..."Doing
just fine."
Doctor..."No
more swelling in your feet and legs?"
Hubby..."No,
they are just fine, see." He lifts his pant legs to show the
doctor.
Doctor..."They
look good. "
The doctor is
sitting on a stool next to hubby who is sitting on the examining
table. The doctor is writing in hubby's chart.
Hubby..."Oh!
I need to get some more Viagra, I am almost out."
The doctor
stops writing and with a puzzled look on his face, lifts his head
just a tad, looks over the top of his glasses at hubby.
Doctor...
"I gave you Viagra?"
Hubby..."Yeah!
Don't you remember when I was here the last time you gave it to me
to lower my cholesterol?"
The doctor
hesitates a moment. I am sure he must have been trying to restrain
himself from bursting out laughing and then he put a smile on his
face.
Doctor..."Oh,
that was Lipator, I didn't think I gave you Viagra! "
Hubby..."Yeah!
That's it, Lipator. "
Don't you
know the doctor and nurses got a huge laugh out of this? I laughed
until I cried when my hubby came home and told me.
********
Wrong
Words
I
am well known for mixing up words or using the wrong words, I hate
to admit it, but now that I am a senior citizen this has become
worse. My hubby and I have had many laughs about things I say
sometimes. He has lived with me so long he even does it once in
awhile.
Each
morning when I get up I feed all our little critters, sometimes my
hubby gives the dogs their milk bones and some times I give them to
them.
One
morning I came bouncing in the kitchen and said...
"Shug
did you dog the bones?" He just looked up at me and quietly
said..."No, I have never done that before, but I will try to if
you want me to." After hearing his answer I realized what I had
said and we both burst out laughing.
My
hubby makes me laugh so hard. He never shows any expression when I
do something like that and he always comes up with a really funny
reply. Then we both can't hold it back any longer we have to laugh
and sometimes we laugh off and on for awhile.
********
Trip
to the Social Security Office
When
it was time for me to sign up for Social Security hubby and I went
for my appointment, this is what transpired as we entered the
building...
We
walked in the door, two guards met us there. I was told to put my
purse upon the conveyor belt that transported it to an x-ray like
machine so they could see what was in it. Then I was told to walk
through the metal detector. I did as they asked and walked on over
out of the way to wait on my hubby.
He
was asked to empty his pockets in a basket on the conveyor belt then
walk through the metal detector. He walked through the detector and
set off all kinds of bells and whistles. A guard got him by the arm
and led him several feet away from the metal detector, then took a
handheld detector and started running it all up and down my hubby.
Every
time the detector went over the lower left part of his body it would
begin to sing out that funny little noise they make. The guard felt
of hubby's pocket and asked him if he had anything on his body that
could be making the alarm go off to which hubby replied
"No".
After
the guard ran the detector all around, up and down, forward and
backward over my hubby it finally dawned on him what was causing
the detector to go off and he told the guard...
"Oh,
that's my 'iron' hip, I forgot about that." The guard just kept
his head down and kept on running that little detector all over
hubby like he had not said a word. I about fell on the floor
laughing. When I gained my composure a bit I walked over to
the guard and said..."It's not an iron hip, he had hip
replacement surgery and he has a steel hip joint and that is what is
setting off the detector." The guard just quietly put away the
detector and motioned for my husband to go on in the office.
We
apologized for not remembering about the hip joint and went on our
merry way.
That
guard never said a word after the "iron hip" he was
probably afraid if he opened his mouth he would not stop
laughing.
When
we were walking back to our car I asked hubby why he called it an
'iron hip' and he said "I thought that is what it is." I
broke out laughing again. Later I told him he better be glad it is
steel and not iron because if he had one of iron he might have a bit
of a problem dragging it around all day. He just calmly
said..."I guess I would, huh?"
